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Deviation Actions
Literature Text
1)
My tawny skin suffocates me
My lackluster lips ring
a looped rope around my neck
2)
Gloom crawls in like creeping vines
strangling my words
Twisting at my wrists and ankles
Suspending them in a purplish hue
3)
I lay contorted on
my cold bathroom floor
Seeking for solace in prescription
television eyes
Only to poke into old wounds
that have not yet healed and
I have only begun to ferment
all my tears into wine
4)
Plant seeds in my blue-green veins
For red blossoms to bloom
in my once-blood's place
My tawny skin suffocates me
My lackluster lips ring
a looped rope around my neck
2)
Gloom crawls in like creeping vines
strangling my words
Twisting at my wrists and ankles
Suspending them in a purplish hue
3)
I lay contorted on
my cold bathroom floor
Seeking for solace in prescription
television eyes
Only to poke into old wounds
that have not yet healed and
I have only begun to ferment
all my tears into wine
4)
Plant seeds in my blue-green veins
For red blossoms to bloom
in my once-blood's place
Free Verse 
Hope you guys enjoy the read!
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I WOULD SUPER LOVE TO SEE COMMENTS, THANK YOU!!
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Critique:
How do you interpret this piece?
Which line did you like/dislike the most?
Was there real impact at any instance?
Hope you guys enjoy the read!
----------------------------------------------------------------------------
I WOULD SUPER LOVE TO SEE COMMENTS, THANK YOU!!
----------------------------------------------------------------------------
Critique:
How do you interpret this piece?
Which line did you like/dislike the most?
Was there real impact at any instance?
© 2013 - 2024 Sammur-amat
Comments29
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How do you interpret this piece?
guilt, mostly; The person is looking at Him/her self in the mirror, and generally looking into their eyes and thinking about their lives. This is where the work becomes less clear - it seems that conjecture is the best ground to fully comprehend this work's overall message.
Which line did you like/dislike the most?
Plant seeds in my blue-green veins
For red blossoms to bloom
in my once-blood's place
Was there real impact at any instance?
I felt like it was me who was feeling all that you had written in your work. And that is a very strong feeling honestly. I liked it.
guilt, mostly; The person is looking at Him/her self in the mirror, and generally looking into their eyes and thinking about their lives. This is where the work becomes less clear - it seems that conjecture is the best ground to fully comprehend this work's overall message.
Which line did you like/dislike the most?
Plant seeds in my blue-green veins
For red blossoms to bloom
in my once-blood's place
Was there real impact at any instance?
I felt like it was me who was feeling all that you had written in your work. And that is a very strong feeling honestly. I liked it.