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Literature Text
I cannot go to sleep, let alone in peace.
I can't even remember the last time I was able to put my head on the pillow come bed time and actually doze off- minus the pills, that is. It's been far too long that I've been sleep depraved and due to this, my body and mind have grown accustomed to falling asleep only after exerting all my physical, mental, and emotional resources.
Whenever I'm in the public eye, my concealer and best-seller sales rep smiles manage to camouflage my exhaustion well. My good friends and dear family though, have already gotten accustomed to receiving the reply, "I'm tired" whenever they ask how I've been or how I'm doing. It's become so very tiring, realizing how tired I am, everyday- each and every goddamn given day.
Even looking in the mirror has become quite the cumbersome task for me. With every passing hour does my hatred for my reflection grow. Similar to a starving fire, I sometimes dream of burning my face and my body like driftwood, like coal, until I turn to cinder and soot, the true forms of my heart and soul.
As I write this note to self, I see my tears forming in my eyes, blurring my vision and I continue to cry; I just chopped off my hair moments earlier. I did so with a pair of school supply scissors and even if you ask me I wouldn't be able to tell you whatever possessed me and why. All I know is my soul has been bleeding for the longest time, and I cannot wait for that lone well to dry. I always, always want to die.
But even then, somehow it scares me for I have yet been able to truly sleep, let alone in jubilee, let alone in peace.
I can't even remember the last time I was able to put my head on the pillow come bed time and actually doze off- minus the pills, that is. It's been far too long that I've been sleep depraved and due to this, my body and mind have grown accustomed to falling asleep only after exerting all my physical, mental, and emotional resources.
Whenever I'm in the public eye, my concealer and best-seller sales rep smiles manage to camouflage my exhaustion well. My good friends and dear family though, have already gotten accustomed to receiving the reply, "I'm tired" whenever they ask how I've been or how I'm doing. It's become so very tiring, realizing how tired I am, everyday- each and every goddamn given day.
Even looking in the mirror has become quite the cumbersome task for me. With every passing hour does my hatred for my reflection grow. Similar to a starving fire, I sometimes dream of burning my face and my body like driftwood, like coal, until I turn to cinder and soot, the true forms of my heart and soul.
As I write this note to self, I see my tears forming in my eyes, blurring my vision and I continue to cry; I just chopped off my hair moments earlier. I did so with a pair of school supply scissors and even if you ask me I wouldn't be able to tell you whatever possessed me and why. All I know is my soul has been bleeding for the longest time, and I cannot wait for that lone well to dry. I always, always want to die.
But even then, somehow it scares me for I have yet been able to truly sleep, let alone in jubilee, let alone in peace.
The most honest and dishonest I've been for a while
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Your feedback, as always,
is both highly anticipated and appreciated
COMMENTS ARE ALWAYS, ALWAYS LOVED!! THANK YOU!!
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Critique:
Which line did you like the least?
Which line did you like the most?
Was there real impact at any instance?
----------------------------------------------------------------------------
Your feedback, as always,
is both highly anticipated and appreciated
COMMENTS ARE ALWAYS, ALWAYS LOVED!! THANK YOU!!
----------------------------------------------------------------------------
Critique:
Which line did you like the least?
Which line did you like the most?
Was there real impact at any instance?
© 2013 - 2024 Sammur-amat
Comments42
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Honest how? Dishonest how?
Also, why?
Who else knows?
You know where to find me if you need to: I always have two listening ears. :c
Also, why?
Who else knows?
You know where to find me if you need to: I always have two listening ears. :c